My Time At The Swimming Pool

Learning intention I am learning to write a hook (an exciting beginning) that captures audience interest levels  

Bombs away I shouted as me and my brothers jumped into the outside swimming pool at the Lagoon pools. While our mum put the food and spare change of clothes on one side of a small hill and we tackled each other in the water. We played catch with a big beach ball that we took from home. After a while we went for something to eat and as we looked inside the food bag. I saw three  fizzy drinks and said “ Hey guys look at these fizzy drinks” as they turned to see what I found. Daniel said “Yay thanks Mum for taking us them ”. As we drank all of our fizzy drinks and ran back into the pool, I took the giant beach ball and threw it at Thomas and Daniel’s heads. I got a bulls eye, but it only harmlessly bounced off. That made them turn and get revenge. They chased me inside the pool and kept throwing the ball aiming for my head until they got bored. I asked them to see if they wanted to play piggy in the middle, they said yes and of cause I was in the middle. So we played for about half an hour and then Mum said “Lets go home now”, so we ate something.  We got changed and went home.